September 27, 2010

Catastrophisize.

Thanks to the television show, Parenthood, and to the characters Adam and Kristina Braverman, there has been a new vocabulary word added to our house. Catastrophisize. Apparently I am quite versed in catastrophisizing, as Rob has found ample opportunities to use this word to bring me back to his reality. My personal definition would be: to envision a catastrophe happening as a possible outcome to a certain scenario. Will it happen, it could. Might it happen, maybe. The odds of it happening, slim. I personally think that mother's lend themselves to catastrophisizing more than fathers do. Obviously, I am not the only catastrophisizer as they have highlighted this phenomenon on national television during primetime at the Braverman house. I think there is nothing wrong with catastrophisizing, it seems to be the mother's job to think through a situation to an outcome and decide if it within her comfort level to allow one of her chicklets to participate in such situation.

I will not rehash each scenario for you however I will bring forth the latest application for this word and the mockery of me, a concerned mother. Yesterday, Rob, Jack, Sophie and myself, had classes/bible bowl up at the church. Our soon to be 14 year old son would be home alone for a bit. As I am getting my bible study materials gathered and about to head out the door I don't see Derek, but I do hear the noise of the lawnmower out the front window. Where is Derek I ask? The kids tell me he is out front mowing the lawn. Now this is a problem for me on two accounts, one - we do not live in a world that is safe to let your kids roam unattended and two - the lawnmower is a dangerous object. Both problems above I deal with when I am at home, they both happen, I do let my kids be in the front yard if I am around and can keep an eye on them, and I do let Derek mow the lawn because it is very helpful and he enjoys it...but there is a parent around when this is happening. Rob notices right away the panicked look I have on my face and I believe he can even anticipate the words before they are being said..."He shouldn't be outside mowing the lawn while we are gone." How does he respond..."Catastrophisize." He then says, "Why do you think he shouldn't mow the lawn without us here?", my response was, "what if he falls down, or reaches down and the lawn mower runs over his arm? We wont be here to help him." This seems like a possible scenario to me. I was quickly shut down by Rob's quizzical look and I decided to defer to my husbands judgement on this and let it go. I did whimper and whine a bit on the way to the car, but as I watched Derek in the rear view mirror I decided that he would probably be o.k.

We had taken two cars to church and I was dropping Sophie off at a friends house after church so I was about 10 minutes later than Rob arriving home. As I am driving down the street I can clearly see Rob and Derek jumping around in the front yard as though they have ants in their pants. I pull into the driveway and Derek has on one of Rob's old thermal long sleeved shirts with his arm pulled all the way up to make it look like his hand has been severed, there is ketchup poured over the hole of the sleeve, Rob has numerous paper towels bunched up with ketchup smeared on them, and Derek has water poured on his face to look like tears and sweat all the while he and Rob are screaming...you were right, his hand was cut off by the lawnmower.

I pouted in the car and told them, "I refuse to be mocked!!" They just laughed their heads off and went inside. Derek scrubbed the shirt to rid it of the fake blood and I just pretended that none of that ever happened.

Catastrophisize. It is a mother's right.

3 comments:

Dee Andrews said...

I hate to tell you this, Tammy (being a "former" - ha - mother, myself), but that is hilarious!!

Sounds exactly like what one of my three kids would have pulled. On their own. Including my daughter!

You've certainly given me a big smile this afternoon.

Hang in there . . . it only gets WORSE when they're ALL teens!!

Dee

Connie Chrane said...

Tell Rob and Derek I said that wasn't funny! Reminds me of the time Eddie "fell off" the 4-wheeler just before me and my niece drove up behind him. Let's just say he hasn't played that trick on my since... based on my reaction, he probably won't do it again, either!

ChristyCate said...

Love it!!! Hilarious!