January 04, 2010

Earth Shattering Silence/God's Road

My kids just ran out the door to catch the school bus which was about 2 minutes early, with a slam of a door and a picture falling off the wall as the final explosion all is quiet now, very quiet. The older my children get the more I treasure us being together. The holiday breaks mantra used to be "just make it through" till school starts back up again. Now we all drag our feet together as the days close in to the holiday break being o.v.e.r. Something has happened to my children as they have grown up, they have become self sufficient. I read a parenting book years ago that had written in it...if a child is able to do something for themselves, then it becomes their responsibility...i.e. dressing themselves, getting a snack or a glass of water, cleaning their room, making their bed. We are still working on the bed making part, but most of the time they are very self sufficient. I am glad that they are...self sufficient in what they are able to do, but I sometimes miss those chubby little fingers and hands that would hold on to mine and not know how to do anything for themselves. Most of the time though I am thrilled that my kids are turning into young adults right before my eyes...in the blink of an eye they will be adults. I am cherishing all the moments.

---------------

Somethings about to change...it could be the melting of the last frost on the ground before spring, the smell of a fresh rain that is making it's way to you, the fall of the first leaf in autumn. I feel that way right now, in one week I will be taking a full load of classes at ACU. I am heading back to finish my bachelor's degree, I have 21 hours down and a lot more to go. The smell of new adventures is in the air. The adventures will be furnished by the Lord. He has put it on my heart to go back, and truth be known I don't know exactly why. When I decided to follow God's plan I felt it necessary to have the next 20 years of my life planned out, to justify this crazy act of going back to school to others and myself. My thoughts went something like this..."yes, Lord, I will go back to school, but that sounds pretty crazy to me, so let me come up with a plan of my own to take some of the "unknown" out of it." When asked I would say that I thought I would go back for my bachelors, masters and then look into teaching as I would work on a ph.d. Each time I said it none of it rung true in my ears, I just felt like I needed a plan. Because people ask...and I didn't want to sound flighty...but each time I spoke this plan out of my mouth I would feel the Lord saying, that's not My plan, I haven't given you A. B. and C. yet, just A. and A. is to go back to school and study the bible. I have no idea the road God will lead me on, but I do know from vast experience that His road is much more worthy than the roads I have chosen for myself. I like my roads straight, dust free, and without foliage so I can see where I am headed. God's roads however are generally the opposite of mine, but they are much more exciting and beautiful.

0 comments: